butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
