just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
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