She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
im holly from the hills drunk
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
