I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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