I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
