yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
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