are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize
