i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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