Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
