So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
