hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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