How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Randomize
