I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
