is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize