quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
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