Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
