So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
