woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
