Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
