We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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