I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize
