Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
he wants to bone in the snuggie
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
