Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
