Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
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