don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Randomize
