A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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