wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Randomize
