Jerry, you need to find god
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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