It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
