Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
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