am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
