She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
