Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
