Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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