where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
