ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize