i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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