I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Randomize