...so i touched it.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize