If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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