we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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