I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Randomize
