I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
