Texts From Last Night

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  (407): View more from Florida

  I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms

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  (407): I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms http://tfl.nu/rxh4
  Replies (5) Good night (666) Bad night (1096)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..

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  (651): You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold.. http://tfl.nu/rd4a
  Replies (18) Good night (5756) Bad night (623)
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  (325): View more from Texas

  Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero

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  (325): Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero http://tfl.nu/zl6f
  Replies (58) Good night (6475) Bad night (1080)
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  (631): View more from New York

  i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.

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  (631): i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to. http://tfl.nu/8bc1
  Replies (6) Good night (4335) Bad night (538)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick

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  (210): Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick http://tfl.nu/y4fo
  Replies (61) Good night (5559) Bad night (1224)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"

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  (206): it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting" http://tfl.nu/ix3k
  Replies (8) Good night (3167) Bad night (1072)
• Favorite

  (906): View more from Michigan

  He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...

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  (906): He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me... http://tfl.nu/pc0c
  Replies (21) Good night (2219) Bad night (3760)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment

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  (201): There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment http://tfl.nu/jnnd
  Replies (2) Good night (591) Bad night (1408)
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.

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  (618): I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help. http://tfl.nu/o577
  Replies (6) Good night (805) Bad night (1730)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.

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  (918): What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how. http://tfl.nu/o4fq
  Replies (12) Good night (3151) Bad night (1213)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"

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  (484): Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME" http://tfl.nu/xsgw
  Replies (6) Good night (616) Bad night (1041)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant

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  (614): Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant http://tfl.nu/jhvb
  Replies (3) Good night (952) Bad night (393)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs

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  (704): Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs http://tfl.nu/e56e
  Replies (2) Good night (805) Bad night (283)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical

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  (408): If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical http://tfl.nu/decu
  Replies (0) Good night (510) Bad night (235)
• Favorite

  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"

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  (902): He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!" http://tfl.nu/vkmc
  Replies (0) Good night (754) Bad night (204)

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