Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.