I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
