Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
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critical mistake not lubing the nipples
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
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Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
A+ Viking dick
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
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