you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize
