yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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