i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
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