So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize