Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Randomize
