Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
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